Depressed mOM WITH DEPRESSION day in the life

A Day in the Life of a Mom with Depression

6:00 Eyes pop open and brain sizzles. Realize that the two-year-old is still asleep and you don’t have a headache, for the first time in two or three weeks. Try to go back to sleep but your brain is on now and you can’t. Try to get out of bed. Lay there. Your neck and shoulders hurt so much you can barely move your head.

7:00 Get up and find coffee. You are so achey you hobble down the stairs like an 85 year old. You know you’re not sick and that it isn’t from too much exercise. The boys are ready to get on the bus and just want their snuggles and love. You just want to be left alone, but you do give the hugs and kisses. Realize that you have some time completely alone and you take advantage of it and read your Bible. Sneak in a little creative verse drawing.

8:00 Decide to work out for the first time in several days. Can’t get the TV to turn on. Try to watch videos to entertain you on your phone. But it’s just not working and you keep getting distracted and get off the trampoline several times to clean this or pick that up and put that away. Grab another cup of coffee. The little girls are up now. Kevin comes in the house briefly and fixes the TV by unplugging it and plugging it back in. Your foggy brain couldn’t come up with that solution. You hug and kiss him in thanks but he’s in a rush and you feel brushed off.

9:00 You feel like you’re moving through a field of molasses in a swamp. Sometimes it feels like you are a swamp walker all the time.  Everything takes such a colossal effort.  The big girls are up and the boys are back home. You homeschool, and you keep thinking that you’ll do school  with the kids but you also want to see if you can get some more walking in and watch motivational videos which improve your mood.  You can’t get them motivated to do their work when you can’t get motivated yourself.  They get their own breakfasts and watch YouTube while you keep walking on the rebounder. Put on some educational videos at least.

10:00 Check your planner and remember that your daughter’s orchestra concert is tonight. Cry, because doing something in the evening seems like it is way too overwhelming. The husband is telling you someone is going to come over and consult about  the floor you’re hoping to put in, and you know the piano teacher will be here soon so you get dressed and put on some make up. You play with your two-year-old and watch her laugh, but feel apathetic. You wish you could be so carefree.

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11:00 The kids’ piano teacher arrives and you walk the dog down to the barn to find your son. It’s a beautiful sunny day and you want to stay outside but the wind is too windy and the wind chimes are to chime-y and the sun is too shiny. You go back inside.  Time passes and you don’t even know what you did.

12:00 Now it is lunchtime and you realize you had meant to go down and get hamburger out of the freezer to thaw several times and never actually made it happen. Let the kids make their own sandwiches. Do some reading and Marco Polo with some friends. Want to support them and what they’re going through. It’s very hard because you don’t have any emotional strength for yourself.

1:00 It is time to take oldest to orchestra. You cry because Finnella cries and tries getting in the car. You go and get your nails done so they look pretty because feeling pretty makes you feel better. And they are pretty,  but it doesn’t really help. You’re reading a book about a recovering drug addict who is in jail and it’s hard even feel any empathy with her and you know your problems aren’t even that big but they seem insurmountable.

2:00 You get home and take a picture of your crabapple trees because three of the four of them aren’t blooming and it really bugs you, as in, you think about the not blooming trees on a regular basis. Bugs you like,  it comes up at random times in your mind, “Why aren’t they blooming?! Why do all the other trees look so good!?”  And you want to post to gardening experts about what you should do.

You try to think of solutions for the things that really bother you because you know it’s not normal thinking. But you can’t help it, and actually finding a gardening forum is overwhelming and several days later it’s still not done.day in the life with depression depressed mental health mom mother mental illnessYou see your puppy lying still in the yard. She doesn’t get up when the car drives into the lane. Suddenly you worry that she’s dead, she’s really dead. What would you do if she was dead?? You feel your heart racing and you start sweating, and you’re breathing rapidly and you can’t think of anything else but if she’s dead and so you start to walk over to her and she lifts her head  and runs excitedly over to you. You thank God she’s not dead and you know that it’s crazy to even have thought that she’s dead, and that logically it’s nearly an impossibility but you can’t help it. You snuggle her for a while.

3:00 The kids are all playing out back and you watch them through the deck doors for a while and marvel at their wonderful creativity even know they’re doing some things they’re really not supposed to be doing, like playing with the fire escape ladder. You don’t have the energy to make them take the ladder back upstairs and have a sneaking suspicion that it will be in that tree all summer, but you can’t even care. You are just glad they are leaving you alone.

You have gotten the new patches for the ceiling in the mail so you apply one.

You go out to the yard to try to get some vitamin D.

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When the kids discover that you’re home, you really can’t handle them climbing around on you so you go sit in the living room and they wander off to play outside some more. When the two-year-old comes to ask you to read to her you do, but you are so exhausted that you just fall asleep. You literally just fall asleep on the couch without meaning to.

5:00 The next thing you know your 13-year-old is telling you that it is time to leave for her orchestra concert and asking if you can please do her hair. You do a  pull through braid, very loose  and beautiful. But she doesn’t think it’s fancy enough and doesn’t think that there is enough time to fix it again and she make up. You feel defeated. No one can understand how hard it was to just make yourself braid that incredible child’s hair.

You actually did remember to have someone get the meat out of the freezer. But now there  is no time to make dinner. The kids have to fend for themselves again. Brielle has offered to stay home with Finnella (2) and Elivette (5) so you let her despite your misgivings because it would be a lot easier to not have to deal with the little girls during the concert.

You notice that the spackle on the ceiling is dry so you start to do that, even though it’s nearly time to leave.  You just think you would have enough time while Aviana finishes her make up. She’s annoyed by this idea, because it’s really a foolish move to try and spread spackle smoothly on the ceiling when you have a deadline of walking out the door in a couple of minutes. Your brain just doesn’t do logical sometimes a lot of the time.

6:00 You’ve arrived on time at the concert and save seats for Aviana’s (and your) friends , and the husband and Cadrian (9)who are coming. Denton (7) plays a game on the Kindle and you try to read your book on your Kindle app on the phone. It’s super hard to concentrate because you worry you will miss the people you’re saving seats for. Your legs are aching like crazy and your whole body feels out of control and heavy and fuzzy. You can’t just sit still and enjoy reading.

7:00 The concert is four different orchestras and your daughter gets two recognition certificates. You’re really proud of her, and want to enjoy the remainder of concert, but you also really want to leave. It’s hard to keep in your seat, but it helps to have the boys asking questions and feeling restless too, because helping them behave appropriately and encouraging them, helps you.

9:00 You discover that Kevin has stopped at McDonald’s because he didn’t get supper. You didn’t get supper either. You could have stopped for food too, but chose to get home instead. After getting the boys in bed and talking with Brielle and Aviana, you have some time to talk with Kevin, for the first time in several weeks.

In spite of feeling grumpy towards him, you’re working at flirting with your husband and talking with him about vacation plans and ideas. And everything seems to be going really well when he says some snide things to you. Whether unintentional, or intentional,  you say “You don’t need to make fun of me like that,” when he tries to drive a point home several ways. Then he gets offended and suddenly you’re in a fight, and you’re comparing him to Donald Trump, and he stamps out of the room. Now you’re alone again.

10:00 You apologize for the Donald Trump comment and then sit on the couch scrolling and watching Intervention. You like Intervention because they’re worse off than you are, you know you don’t want to self medicate like they do, and  you do want to learn how to handle your emotions in a healthy way, and learn better coping skills,  and almost all of the episodes are a story of redemption.

1:00 a.m. You take your vitamins and medicine,  go to bed and watch it some more until your eyes are heavy enough and your brain is numb enough to finally sleep. You average between 5 and 6 hours of sleep when the depression is bad. And it’s been bad lately.

 

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Stylish Mom on the Go

I don’t consider myself to be a super-chic mom, but, just like you, I am a busy mom on the go, who likes to look the best I can! I like ideas of how to be frugally fashionable, so I share my photos of my weekly fashion “uniform”. Find out why I love it, and what each outfit is perfect for in the never ending daily of mom life.

This post contains affiliate links. Clicking through gives both of me benefits because I get a small compensation and you benefit by seeing cute things! That makes us friends with benefits. 

outfit stylish mom style on the go spring

Hat: Husband’s

Dress: Casa Lee via Goodwill

This is the perfect outfit to wear to church,  do some errands, (how do I always end up doing errands on Sundays?!), hang out with your two year old while the rest of the family goes to 11 year old’s play,  go out to dinner with some dear friends, stay out too late having too much fun, but feel so relaxed and happy by then end of the night it’s totally worth it.

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Shirt: Banana Republic via Goodwill (similar)

Skirt: Tangerine Trek Skort via Goodwill

Sweater: Wish (similar)

This outfit is perfect for trying to do your best. Forgetting to take your usual outfit photo and doing it in the bathroom before you head off to bed is part of that.

outfit stylish mom style on the go spring

Sweater: Land’s End via handmedown

Tank top: Walmart via thrifted

Shorts: New York and Company via Goodwill

This outfit is perfect for feeling like you’re constantly failing and reassuring yourself that you’re doing your best and trying to listen to your own positive advice. It’s perfect for having a Hard Day.

Sleepshirt: Zulily

This outfit is perfect for sleeping. I actually wore athleisure pants and a tank this day but forgot to take a picture.

outfit stylish mom style on the go spring

Shirt: Stitch Fix

Skirt: Goodwill

Shoes: FitFlops via Amazon

This outfit is perfect for exploring and discovering and resting. It’s also good for running around like a crazy person to fit in a massage. It’s also excellent for being perfectly contradictory.

stylish mom outfit ideas busy active mama real life

Shirt:  Eddie Bauer via Goodwill (similar)

Necklace: Target (similar)

Basic jeggings

Boots: Goodwill (similar)

Two year old: homemade

Trashed kitchen: Two year old (and her siblings) (and likely their mother)

This outfit is perfect for doing so many things including  picking up groceries and organizing bins and going shopping with Thirteen and trying to install “easy to install” tile and really wanting to give up and go to bed but you’ve made plans with your bestie to go out and have some Her time. It’s perfect for having a couple of drinks and a scrumptious dinner and then sitting at her house and feeling wonderfully relaxed for the first time in forever.

outfit ideas stylish mom style on the go spring

This outfit is perfect for putting on after spending the morning exercising and watching YouTube in your pajamas and seriously wanting to stay at home but get talked into heading to the mall and interacting with as few people as possible and then spend the rest of the evening hiding lounging in your room.

Headband: I cut off the bottom of the dress because it was awkwardly long.

Sweater: Wish

Dress: Goodwill

Belt: Amazon

Boots: Goodwill

 

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You’re tired, Mom. Here’s why.

In honor of Mother’s Day-have a nap! We know you’re tired! These could be reasons why:

  1. The neighbor’s dog is barking.
  2. Firecrackers. Somewhere.
  3. It was daylight savings time last month and you still haven’t recovered.
  4. You’re hungry and you can’t sleep but you are too tired to get up and make a snack.
  5. Your kid peed the bed.
  6. Your kid threw up in your bed.
  7. Your kid threw up in her bed.
  8. You threw up.
  9. You got your kid’s throw up in your hands.
  10. Your kid stepped on a cactus in the middle of the night.
  11. Your child can’t find his blanket.
  12. Your child’s pillow is too lumpy.
  13. Your teenager is out with friends.
  14. Your teen came home drunk.
  15. Your husband sleeps like a polecat on a leash.
  16. The dog needs to go out.
  17. You buckled and unbuckled baby dolls in the van 57 times.
  18. Musical beds. The adults never win.
  19. 4 shots of espresso doesn’t last long.
  20. You drank 4 shots of espresso and now you can’t sleep.
  21. Carrying laundry up and down stairs a bajillion times takes all your energy.
  22. The people who sleep in your bed talk in their sleep.
  23. People snore.
  24. You’re close to menopause and get night sweats.
  25. You got a muscle cramp and have been awake since 4:22 a.m.

Thank you to the amazing community of the Quad City Crunchy Mamas for their contributions and ideas to this list! ❤️

For more reasons you are tired, check out the post I wrote for the Quad City Moms Blog.

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Books You Need to Read (and a couple you may not)

I hate when people waste my time describing a book in their review. That is not the point of a review. I want to know if it was good and if the book will be worth reading. That’s what I do in my book reviews.  I don’t really have time to finish less than three star books anyway,  so you won’t find a bad book (at least in my opinion) here.

Here’s what I read in April.

This post contains affiliate links, which help me keep my kids stocked with books and food, all at no cost to you!

Oh my gosh. I read a book about hockey, and I loved it. My reading a book about hockey, which isn’t really about hockey, is a feat in and of itself, but loving it, even while I hated it, was incredible. It’s beautiful and tough and real and gritty. I was filled with despair and hope and satisfaction.

The quotable material and phrases and words I want to remember forever filled several notebook pages. I couldn’t make it five stars because of the depth of detail about some of the awfulness that can happen to people, but it will still be one of the best books I read this year. You must read this book.

**Check out spoiler reviews on Goodreads though if you feel you might have certain triggers about any of the difficult topics addressed. **

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is the Queen of Mystery in excellent form. If you’ve never read her, I recommend starting with this one or And Then There Were None. It’s dated, obviously, so you do need to prepare yourself for that. I generally like Miss Marple better than Hercule Poirot, as far as Agatha’s detectives go. We have integrated one of his phrases from this book into our family lexicon as a joke, with an exaggerated French accent; “Because sir, I do not like your face.”

I would have liked to have a handy French dictionary with all the pronunciations for the many French phrases. Maybe when she wrote this, it was expected that the general public spoke French, but it certainly isn’t the case now!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh my goodness! The entire first half of the book made me want to gnaw my arm off! I hated being kept in suspense about what had happened the day of the ding-dong-dang barbeque! But once we got into the second half, it was a wonderful thing. It was so real, so healing. I cried in several different places. It was a phenomenal ending with so many good things.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As guide to motivate you and explain why you should pursue your dream of an internet based business, this book is on the mark. As an actual how-to do that, it is seriously a fail.  It does help to get you motivated and it does make you believe that you can leave the regular workaday life and start something you’re passionate about via the internet. He does a good job of outlining how people seem to make money from a variety of sources via social media and the web. He describes it’s possible for you to take your blog from basic, to a full time income. And possibly that’s all the book is supposed to be. Maybe it’s not meant to get into detail of how to actually make that dream happen.

My understanding was that it was supposed to though. It was disappointing that he didn’t get into the nitty gritty or the actual how to. I got this book because one of my favorite YouTubers recommended this as a life changing book. I definitely wouldn’t go that far, but it was encouraging. It was a fast read, so I didn’t feel like it was a lot of time wasted.

 

 

I love World War II stories, there  is something so powerful about the triumphs and tragedies that happened in my grandparents’ and in-laws’ life times. This book was especially compelling. I seriously found it to be one of the best books I’ve ever read. It contained such interesting and incredible perspectives and intersections. Wonderfully well researched, Lilac Girls was enjoyable and heart touching, as well as awful to contemplate. I can’t recommend highly enough.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



I was fascinated by this book. It is written in an anthropological style, so it is just a report of people, their stuff and how they interact with it. No judgement, no assessment, just details. I loved being invited into these families’s homes and peeking around at their belongings and  home life. It’s an aspect we often, if ever, are not privy to. If you’re as interested in other people and how they live as I am, you need to get a hold of Life at Home. It’s real life, y’all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 It was intriguing enough to make me want to keep reading but I had already forgotten the title by the time I came to put in in Goodreads a few days later. The title was why I picked it up in the first place. I wasn’t even sure I liked the main characters and didn’t know whether I wanted good things to happen to them. I was also irritated that being thin and good looking was emphasized so much in the main character’s transformation into becoming more confident.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What an amazing book! I couldn’t put it down. I stayed up until the early hours of the morning because I had to finish this story. It’s been ages since I have been that engrossed in a book, or that affected by a story for that matter. There aren’t words to describe the emotions you feel while reading this.

Awed that the author was able to impart such an unvarnished, yet grippingly beautiful story of life in Virginia in the late 18th century, the plight and powerlessness of both slaves and women, the interesting turns in fortune, I rate this book unputdownable.  I should tell you, that I read Alex Haley’s Roots and Queen at a young impressionable age, so my bar for this type of story is pretty high.  I felt like I could genuinely SEE each of the characters in my mind as I read, which, frankly, doesn’t really happen to me all that often. So much tragedy happens to so many people that one does start to get a little numb, but I still couldn’t stop reading. I felt as if I were an unfortunate witness to their lives. Nearly everyone in this story is admirable, and even those who aren’t, you still feel anguish for the things they went through to make them be as they are. This is a book I will remember for years to come.  I highly recommend you block out some time and pick up this book.

**Check out spoiler reviews on Goodreads though if you feel you might have certain triggers about any of the difficult topics addressed. **

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What I Wore Weekly- Spring Mom Outfits

You’re a busy real life mom. I am too. I share with you relatable   outfits and wearable, stylish fashion so you can feel put together while you’re wiping noses and tables and feeling wiped out. It’s a challenge to be fashionable on a budget, but I can help you with that!

This post contains affiliate links, which help me keep my kids stocked with books and food, clicking through is good for me, at no cost to you!

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Sweater: hand me down

Crochet Vest: Goodwill

Support your local farmers shirt: Zulily You can find one like it HERE

Jeans: Zulily

Gold Skechers: Purchased at Ross and you can get yours here

This outfit is perfect for hanging out with your 13 year old all day in Des Moines and finding out she was an alternate for qualifying for Nationals at the state level of National History Day!

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Hat: Dollar Tree similar HERE

Shirt: Goodwill

Skirt: Land’s End via Goodwill (I cut five inches off the bottom as it was an awkward length. I just left the hem raw. If you like an item but it has something wrong with it, see if you can alter it easily.)

Shoes: FitFlops available HERE

This is the perfect outfit in which to wake up with another headache and try to do your best and get the basics done and with a pretty good attitude even though you’re seriously not feeling it. It’s also good for standing in some weeds at the side of the road because it makes a cool photo.

style mama SAHM fashion outfit of the day what to wear mom cheap chic frugal

Dress: actually a nightgown a friend gave me because her more abundant boobage kept escaping–I don’t have that problem, unfortunately. And who can tell it’s meant to be a nightgown anyway? This is another way to save money. (Also it was literally because I just didn’t bother to get dressed)

lace vest: Goodwill

Hat: Goodwill

Shoes: NEW Old Navy via Goodwill

Necklace: Target

This is the perfect outfit in which to have a migraine and not want to get up but you have to get up and sit very still until you’re forced to do something and then just throw on some accessories because you have to take people places and people are coming over but thankfully by then you feel better and can enjoy your friend and kids’ friends and the first party of the year and dancing in the rain. But seriously, people, I wore a nightgown all day.

second hand thrifty fashion mom life outfit of the day style

Cardigan: Wish

Shirt: hand-me-down

Skirt: Old Navy via Goodwill

Shoes: Like, 15 year old Skechers, seriously, these have lasted for freeking ever

Necklace: hand-me-down

Earrings: Shortline Design

This is the perfect outfit in which to get a bit of business done, have some friends over and run here and there, and go to the chiro and acupuncturist finally and fall asleep and for sure drool, and then realize you don’t have enough time to run home and change at least your shoes and fix your hair (which is left over from the day before!) because you get to help host the Bloom! Event with the Quad City Mom’s Blog, but you just smile and act like you meant to do it all along. And when you get home, it’s perfect for hiding in the car in the garage because you just don’t want to talk to your people but of course they are waiting up for you, and hug them but you can’t sleep and feel sad.

 

Silk Vintage Scarf: Thrifted from Life’s Little Treasures

Sweater: Hand-me-down

Sloth dress: Amazon

Jeggings: Sam’s Club

Converse: eBay

Earrings: Iowa hand made by Shortline Design

You can see another way I styled this dress here.

This is the perfect outfit in which to wake up with ANOTHER headache and not even want to face the day but you do it anyway and you are glad because you get to serve with your family and your CC (other) community and move a lot of rocks and hang out with your kids who are your favorite people and have lunch at a park and sit in the van ALONE while the boys are in tutoring because the two year old fell asleep and take them to Walmart because even though you did the pick up thing, you forgot several things and buy a new amazing mop that you’re in love with, but also that the kids want to use all the time, so that’s a win, and an incredible carpet cleaning gadget that is way less than the ridiculous heavy Kirby you spent a lot of money on a long time ago but works way better and actually gets all the stains out in the worst of the carpet (which you hate but that’s another story) and to think you’re going to sit and relax at the end of a long day, one in which your husband is not only working late, but he’s in another state and then when you take the dog outside, you see that the COWS ARE OUT so then you spend the rest of the evening chasing stupid bovines and you fall asleep on the couch and sleep there all night because it was a hard day; but at least you got your steps in.

This is also the perfect outfit to wear for most of the next day until the mail comes and you get your new tee shirt, so you change so you can put it on.

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Five year old took this picture.

Shirt: IOWA by the Iowa City Mom’s Blog  I hate when clothes are too small so I ordered it a little big, but this particular style was WAY too big, but I got to put four tiny rubber bands on the inside and kind of blouse it and it looked awesome.

Shorts: Levi’s via Goodwill (I bought these last spring, but ended up gaining a lot of grief/stress weight, and they were too small and I could never wear them, however, I actually took the tags off today!)

Sandals: American Eagle via Goodwill

Necklace: Etsy, gift from a friend/doula client

Earrings: Shortline Design

I bought both these shorts and sandals last spring when I was putting together a summer capsule wardrobe on a tight budget: you can read about that here.

This is the perfect outfit in which to build chain reactions with your boy and spruce up the kitchen a bit and give baths to horribly dirty people, and clean all the things over and over because seriously as soon as you put away those towels somehow they’re out again when you walk back into that room, and really want to see your friends but decide you need a quiet night in even more and that’s hard and it’s perfect in which to be sad and cry because a year ago today was when your beloved mother-in-law went into intensive care for a couple of weeks and then got better and then suddenly we lost her. Life is hard without her. Spring is always hard for me, but it’s especially hard without her, her experience, her understanding, her having been through so many spring plantings and farm crises and survived, her help and assurance.  It’s hard without her.

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Farmhouse Decor: Cheap and Easy

I live in a 170 year old farmhouse on a working farm.  A genuine farmhouse kitchen in real life is slightly different from the farmhouse decor on Pinterest. One of my promises on my blog is to always be real-to show you how it really is single momming during spring planting, with six kids and a puppy, and  not having a lot of money to buy the perfect farmhouse decor.

cheap and easy farmhouse decor farmhouse kitchen real life farmhouse old house
The wall behind my breakfast nook

I’ve been working on updating my kitchen. I have carpet in my eating area from 1987 y’all. We have had a lot of changes in here in the 15 years we’ve been married and I’m finally in a place to learn how to DIY on my own to make even more!

This post contains affiliate links, which help me keep my kids stocked with books and food, all at no cost to you!

This wall has been blank since Christmas when we hang our advent calendars there, until Brielle, my 11 year old took two signs off the porch and threw them up on the nails. I started kind of thinking about what I wanted and decided I love the current trend of a collage. I don’t think I’m done yet, but here’s what we’ve got so far.

Here’s what my kitchen looked like in 2008! I have changed it so much over the past 10 years, even I can’t believe it!

cheap and easy farmhouse decor farmhouse kitchen real life farmhouse old house
Abide in my love John 15:7

One of my besties gave me this sign and it’s just perfect.

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My children are homeschooled hobbits, for real.

I made this sign because homeschooled hobbits live around here. I’ve been thinking of inexpensively selling some of the prints I make. Let me know how that interests you!

The frame is from Goodwill. I took the cardboard off the back and wrapped it in regular 11×17 typing paper and taped the print on there.

cheap and easy farmhouse decor farmhouse kitchen real life farmhouse old house art for kids
My son drew this when he was 8 1/2

My 9 year old drew and colored this for me last year. He followed a tutorial from Art for Kids Hub, which we adore!

The white frame is from Goodwill. I spray painted it white, and my impatience and mistakes made for some perfect distressing and crackling. Here at Yellow Barn Farms,  I don’t even have to try to achieve the cheap chic look-that is just how I roll 🙂 I get that worn, farmhouse look accidentally.

cheap and easy farmhouse decor farmhouse kitchen real life farmhouse old house
A real life farm house kitchen

The Farm Fresh sign is from Target’s Dollar Spot. I got the bird sign at Michaels on clearance with a couple of smaller matching ones. I didn’t even plan for it to be in the kitchen, so it’s especially crazy how it matches so well. The phone on the wall belonged to The Handsome Husband’s grandma. She was a rural telephone operator in the 40s and 50s. My diva dog dish is actually an old fashioned hors d’oeuvres server from Goodwill. The color is Tropical Heat by Behr.  All the paint in my house is Behr.  It’s my absolute favorite.

We bought the nook benches at Oak Express and long ago outgrew the table. This one was a Craigslist find on which The Handsome Husband put high gloss bar epoxy resin so it would hold up better to the constant beating our furniture takes. I love it. It looks like glass and the children have to try really hard to scratch it.

It doesn’t take a lot more time to thrift some of your ornamentation or furnishing and update your decor with inexpensive and quick little changes. I’d love to hear how you save money when you decorate!

 

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What I Wore Weekly-Real Life Mom

This post contains affiliate links-at no cost to you, clicking through helps keep my children in books and food! 

You’re a busy real life mom. I am too. I share with you relatable outfits and wearable, stylish fashion so you can feel put together while you’re wiping noses and tables and feeling wiped out.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Sunglasses: Warby Parker

Kimono: Goodwill

Wild and Free Mama Shirt (similar)

Necklace: National Institute of Art (similar), Noonday

Watch: Amazon

Pants: Sam’s Club

Shoes: Walmart ($5!!)

This is the perfect outfit in which to keep and feed 8 children, go to town at Goodwill, quickly alter a dress you bought, take the Middlets bowling and out to Steak and Shake and genuinely enjoy your offspring.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Faux Leather Moto Jacket: Goodwill

Tanktop: Goodwill

Necklace: Amazon (similar)

Pants: No Nonsense  (pockets! Not see through! Cheap!) from Amazon

Sandals: Chinese Laundry at Francesca’s (A Store in the MALL!) but you can buy them here!

This is the perfect outfit on which to spill coffee within eight minutes of donning it, in which to have an enlightening therapy session, and to take off and forget to wash for a week.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Shirt: Goodwill

Precision Necklace: Noonday Collection

Pants: Goodwill

Boots: Zulily

This is the perfect outfit to wear for the last last day of Classical Conversations for the Year End Celebration and to take off as soon as you get your son to take this picture and sleep for days, and after which, experience total mental shutdown.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Scarf: Target (I sewed it to make it infinity)

Tanktop: Walmart

Joggers: Ross

Sandals: FitFlops purchased at Zulily but Amazon has them. These are the most comfortable flip flops you will ever own. I’ve even worn them “hiking”!

This is the perfect outfit which to wear for basically two days after you put it on yesterday aternoon. It’s good for doing a lot of communicating, grocery shopping, clothes sorting and donating and labeling, library going, lesson chaueffuering, and momming.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Earrings: Noonday

Top: Goodwill

Pants: Zulily

Shoes: Gold Skechers purchased at  Ross

This is the perfect outfit in which to have a couple of extra kids on board and take everyone roller skating, under strict instructions to not tell me they’re hungry or ask me for any food for the hour and a half you’re there and have your five year old say, “I’m not telling you I’m hungry, I’m just letting you know that if you wanted to buy me a snack, I’m okay with that.” and host an informational meeting for Classical Conversations even though you weren’t really planning on it because no one RSVP’d so you had gone to Dollar Tree instead and try to show yourself grace. Lots and lots of grace because even when you make mistakes, it’s really, truly part of the human experience and it’s really, truly acceptable and expected to make mistakes.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Jacket: Zulily

Dress: Zulily

Earrings: Noonday

Watch: Target

Velvet leggings: Ross

Gingham Converse: Ross

This is the perfect outfit in which to get up early and spend a delightful day in community with other Classical Conversations directors, and learning lots of wonderful ideas.

stay at home mom style fashion frugal mom on the go busy stylish what to wear outfits

Kimono: Goodwill dress I DIY’ed

Dress: Zulily

Belt: Amazon

Necklace: Etsy Five Arrows Gifts

Leggings: Sam’s Club

Silver Sandals: Goodwill but you can get them here!

This is the perfect outfit in which to celebrate 10 years of your church’s existence, connect with some friends briefly, eat fried chicken, laugh hysterically at your daughter’s hilarious play, get chastised by the grumpy old woman siting behind you for your awful cackling, get over it because most people love your laugh, and you’re okay with it, and drive to Des Moines with your oldest to daughter to go to her history day competition.

 

 

 

 

Stay-at-Home Mom Style outfit for the week jeans leggings cheap chic fashion frugal style mom on the go

What I Wore Weekly-Stay at Home Mom Style

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits

hoodie: Birth Boot Camp

basic grey leggings

Shoes: Skechers via Ross

This is the perfect outfit in which to sleep in the top half-because you can’t get the sweatshirt off over the straws you used to make your hair awesome, work out, hang out, go out (well technically to the shops, but it sounded better) and eat out ( and by out, I mean at home, but whatever 🙂 )

I feel like curly hair is fancy. I felt dressy in my hoodie.

You’ll notice that I’m baring some skin here–it was 35 degrees today and if frostbite on my ankles is what it takes to end this always-winter-but-never-Christmas Narnia situation Iowa is poorly imitating, then by golly I’ll do it. This thinking is in no way logical.

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits

jacket: Sam’s Club

Shirt: Old Navy via Goodwill

Sweater like joggers: Ross

Converse: Ross

This is the perfect outfit in which to get the thing done all morning, fall asleep reading to the two year old in the afternoon, and then set out with the idea of working during Eleven’s play practice but only watch clothing hauls on YouTube instead.

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits

Sweater: Ross

Sloth Dress: Amazon

Basic grey leggings

Skechers: Ross

Necklace and Earrings: Noonday

This is the perfect outfit in which to endure ANOTHER April snow, cope with all the last minute changes to the last day of Classical Conversations, be completely overwhelmed and touched out and need space and still not completely check out of life.

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits leggings

Earrings: Noonday

Necklace: gift from some doula clients-the wooden piece in the middle is how big a newborn baby’s tummy is after a week. The smaller beads are how big it is at 1 and 3 days.

Basic white tee

Shirt: Old Navy via Goodwill

Boyfriend jacket which is actually my husband’s jacket: Goodwill

Super soft leggings: Aldi

Boots: Younkers

Attached children: Boy was made in the Caribbean, the other two are farm fresh

This is the perfect outfit in which to get in 10,000 steps by noon, clean up all the messes-like when the little girls had permission to play with moon sand OUTSIDE, but then I found them in the kitchen, or when I was doing grocery shopping online and they both traipsed through the house with muddy boots on, and by clean up I mean make them do it which is infinitely harder, force people to go for walks and be outside and enjoy the beautiful sunny weather, and spend some hard won time alone sitting in the van, reading a terrific home design book.

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits

Hair: styled by sleeping

hoodie: Zulily

jeans: Zulily

Shoes: Walmart (chosen by Brielle)

This is the perfect outfit in which to be trapped in a van with your kids/hoodlums for far too many hours, clean the kitchen far too many times, listen to far too much yelling, and have a cozy at home date night watching a far too creepy of a movie.

Stay at home mom style fashion cheap frugal easy outfits

Earrings: Goodwill

Shirt: AB Studio via Goodwill

vest: TEK Gear via hand-me down from friend

Boyfriend Jeans: Zulily

Velvet Boots: Target

This outfit is perfect for doing a zero dollar kitchen update aka taking some cabinet doors off, taking a daughter to play practice, taking sons out for a lunch date and to do some woodworking, taking time to tickle the tiny daughters and play, taking a different daughter and sons to a Classical Conversations year end celebration, and taking time to rest and read.

I love frugal fashion! What would you like to see and read more of?

Potty Training

Potty Training My Sixth Child

Potty Training my Sixth Kid

One would think I would be an expert in all things child, since I do have children ranging in age from 13-2. I’ve got boys and girls. I’ve got all the personalities (Ok, maybe not, since there are 16 main personalities, but it feels like it most days!)

I’ve got lots of experience in many layers of different. All five of my older children were out of diapers full time before they were three. They all currently use the potty on the regular.

potty training three year old
Three year olds sleeping without diapers can be risky

With my first five, they had a little sibling coming along around the time they turned two, so I was hyper-vigilant before the new baby arrived. We had long stints of Elimination Communication when they were wee babies. I instituted “Potty Train your Kid in Two Days” (Lies!) type policies. We used cloth diapers when we were out and about so they could feel the wetness. They were pantsless at home. They got chocolate chips when they did their business in the right place. They got it. They learned.

One would think potty training my sixth child would be a breeze.

If you think that, you would be wrong.

potty training before three
Almost two year old covered in caulk on the potty

Even with more eyes that should be watching this sixth kid, she gets away with more. Case in point: she completely flooded the bathroom the other day. There was at least an inch of water on the floor. The drawers in the vanity under the sink were two/thirds filled with water.

Kevin was home with the kids while I was on a writing retreat, and I like to think it wouldn’t have happened on my watch. (Lies.) Perhaps with more people around to keep an eye on her, everyone else thinks someone else is watching her, and no one actually is.

There’s a possibility she wasn’t being trained as closely during her readiness window because of her beloved grandma being sick and subsequently dying right around her second birthday. It could be because I stopped cloth diapering all together when she was still a baby. We could attribute it to the fact that I didn’t do Elimination Communication as long with her as I did with the other kids. It’s likely she’s just more stubborn and I’m more tired.

Maybe there isn’t a good reason.

The reason doesn’t matter as much as you knowing that whatever stage of motherhood you’re in right now, you’re not alone. Even us seasoned mothers don’t know what we’re doing, or why we’re doing it, or why it’s going wrong. If your kid won’t sleep through the night and is crawling in bed with you, it’s normal, you’re not alone. If you can’t get your kid potty trained by 3, don’t worry, you’re not alone. If road trips make you think you’re going to lose your everloving mind, and any self control you had at any point in your life, you’re not alone. If you’re afraid your kids are going to kill each other in a spatula fight turned nasty, take heart, you’re not alone. What is going on with you and your kids happens to all of us. I’m here for you. You’re not alone.

Unless your kid is using the teeter totter to catapult  dead mice into an open window. Then you might be on your own.

Stay-at-Home Mom

Stay-at-Home Mom Style – Spring

Sweatshirt: Iowa State

Pants: these are so old I have no ide

Shoes: KSwiss from COLLEGE era y’all!

I’m not one to quit on a garment just because it has a little age to it.

This is the perfect outfit in which to spend all day in the rain and in the garage doing an amazing DIY patio update and painting all the things.

Tunic: Zulily

Necklaces : Target and Noonday

Velvet leggings:Target

Boots: Target

This is the perfect outfit in which to premiere as a greeter and usher. I’m a terrific greeter but my ushing was rather clumsy. It’s also perfect in which to take your daughters and friends out to eat and endure the snow and freezing April temperatures, take the girls to A Wrinkle In Time, and write all evening while watching Murder on the Orient Express, while the oldests wrap your hair around 89 straws.

Dress: Goodwill in DC!

leggings: Ross

Shoes: Younkers

Pup: Snuggles and Cuddles

This is the perfect outfit in which to start off optimistic that it’s going to be as lovely as the day before but quickly realize that you’re going to freeze, and supervise the cleaning of the patio and deck and balance bank accounts (well, try to) and babysit three more kids and hope they don’t die and have a bonfire and go out with friends and drink and talk and talk and talk.

Top: Old Navy via Goodwill

pants: PINK via Goodwill

Shoes: Converse via Ross

This is the perfect outfit to wear to babysit and end up with 10 kids including a baby who you get to wear and whose head you get to smell and kiss and know that you know that you know you are done with babies but you are so happy you get to love on friendbabies and to make an actual lunch that almost every body eats, and to buy new chairs at Theisen’s which don’t fit in the car and be late for picking up your Wal-mart grocery order and they have to page people to unlock it but you don’t even care because you just want your Kix!

dress: Garage Sale

Hairbow: chosen and loaned by five year old

practical shoes: Danskos

This is the perfect outfit to wear for Classical Conversations Costume Day and just generally enjoy yourself immensely and not even get irritated when your daughter loses her shoe in the creek and your son wades in over his ankles to retrieve it, or when the two year old refuses to come to the van and you have to chase her across the park but you catch her because you wear the practical shoes.

Sweater: New York and Company via Goodwill

Puffer Vest: Goodwill

pants: Sam’s Club

Boots: Goodwill

This is the perfect outfit in which to stalk and photograph ducks and coots aaaaaaand do some other stuff.

Top: New York and Company cia Goodwill

Puffer Vest: Goodwill

Blanket Scarf: Amazon

Joggers: Zulily

Converse: Ross

This is the perfect outfit in which to get a lot of house work done and school work done and be the best Monday-er in the history of Monday, and also get carried away at the library book sale and also get a manicure and ALSO even make a proper farm wife supper.